halos_child

I don't understand.... yesterday Gammon is talking about how he really wants to talk to me about something that has been bugging him for awhile but he wants to talk to me in person. Then he tells me it's because he can't remember any good stuff - only bad.

Tonight - I called him just now because he had said he was going to call me and hopefully talk to his dad about borrowing his truck and visiting me today. Well it was night and I figured he couldn't but I called all the same and he said he was getting ready for bed.

I was talking to him and he starts talking about how he hates how I take everything negative and expect so much of myself. It isn't that I pick on others or him or his dad etc... its more that I pick on myself that bugs him. He says no one can be perfect and "you aren't that bad".

He says that I'm funny and nice and although bitchy sometimes that I'm smart and all of that... and that he loves me, he said that a lot - but .... why back it up with all the stuff he hates?

He said he loves my spirit but hates my personality - aren't they the same thing? I don't understand...

He says he doesn't want to break up - just talk to me in person... he feels that I'll always blow up and that I told him to talk to me and tell me how he feels and thats all he's doing - he even said at one point that he's just trying to make me happy...I scoffed at that. I said that he usually did make me happy - then he goes into these circles about how he can't remember good times and that everything is negative etc and I can't go around always reminding him of good times.

Ok so I really have nothing to update but I was checking my grades online and figured I would post this one question.

Background:
I took and Environmental Science test today.
The average was a 69%

Now for the question:

HOW THE HELL IS IT POSSIBLE THAT I GOT A 96%?!?

Whoa

I still havent posted pictures...who knows when I will actually get around to that ... but I have just one note I would like to say about what is going on in my life right now...

Jester died... he was my male ferret that I occasionally mentioned.

He wasn't sick, he was wrestling his play mate Jasmine the morning before and I held him that night to show to some friends that were giving him a new cage (with added do dads he would have loved) and he was climbing everywhere and acting as his usual self.

However... this sat. I woke up a little before 7 am to find him on the top shelf...cold..and hard...

My poor baby was fine - but now he isn't. He was a happy go lucky ferret who loved to jump around and chase after your heals and plastic bags. He was young - only 2 yrs old and supposed to live until at least 8yrs. I have no idea what happened but I hope that Jasmine will be ok... I'm babying her with lots of attention and treats and fuzzy bedding. I miss my baby but hopefully all will be well.

Rest In Peace Jester - We Love You.

Or at least it feels like it

It's been a hella ride I guess.

More School - Complete change in management at work with more fallin on you know whose shoulders.

Lots of fucked up crap with Mike but (mainly because of financials) I'm still here.

However - I'm excited enough about something Mike just told me that I felt like updating this darn thing.

He fucked up enough that he lost his student loans/financial aid so he's not in school this semester. He also just told me today he's on his last chance before getting fired from his job (I'm pissed about both of these).

Then he tells me that he's already talked to an Army Reserve recruiter and is going tomorrow to talk to National Guard. Now - some of you may know that I'm not too die hard for the military but respect it all the same.

However - Him...gone? for over a month for basic?!? Sweet. Getting 20k sign on so he can pay bills and pay ME THE FUCK BACK the money he owes me? Oh hell yeah!

And if he gets the position he wants...gone until JUNE payin our rent ahead of time... then lettin me rent out his room?!? (yes this is his idea) YES!!!!

Have financial help... and NOT have to deal with his grabby ass who is annoying me on a daily basis!!!

I hope he does it... yes yes... I do - for those who have actually finished reading this. Thank You :)

Wow!

I hope this keeps up!

Yesterday I found a $10 bill in the rain and today at work I found a $1 bill on the ground!

Whoo Hoo!

Conversation with random guy while walking home from work:

him: you were super quiet walking up behind me!
me: probably because I walk this route a lot *shrugz*
him: I don't walk that much just my truck is kurput
me: ahh well I walk everyday.
him: really?
me: yeah... I figure that making it so that you have to walk places leaves your self to get at least a little bit of excersize everyday. I mean, I know I never want to work out!
him: yeah thats true. thats very european sounding

and he went on to talk about how in europe they walk everywhere if they can...

this amused me greatly :)

ok so I've been working 2-3 times more hours than I have been all semester lately and have been studying like mad for finals and of course dealing with drama.

Some of which was Tiff messing up my schedule and some of which was mike (of course right?).

This stupid Business Law class was kicking my butt almost all semester and I was going nutso hating this proffessor and virtually screaming that I shouldn't have to take the bar exam!!!



Well ...Here is some good news that EVERYONE should know...


I got 2 A's and 3 B's for my ending grades!!!

This leaves me with a 3.02 GBA total... YAY!



Oh and on a side note I have a job interview for a better (although much more physical work) job too! Yeah - today was a good day.

( WOOOOHOOOOO!!! *Jumps up and down with lots of excitement* EEEEEEEE )

Yeah so I haven't been on the computer much because we got a worm on our home computer. Fun stuff let me tell you what.

So that entry about my spring break... if it is ever finished will be very much belated. I've had a lot of drama at work as well with my manager not paying attention to my schedules. She posted a sheet for us to volunteer manning the baseball games. I signed up for 2 days about 2 weeks in advance. When it got up to the day she had me double booked on the schedule because she didn't think to look and see who was working the game. Stupid right? Oh well.

I have been making a LOT of jewelry lately. Mike is buying me a camera so as soon as I get that ya'll will probably see a lot of the stuff so keep an eye out will ya? :)

I am soooo ready for this semester to be over. I want a break and a chance to make more money and reconnect with people. You know - be social. Right now I just don't know what to do with myself. At least I'm putting some of this energy into making things. I just made a business card stand out of a fork lol

Well love ye all

So I had to go to work today for about 4 hours.

During this time my boss comes up to me and tells me I've been TERMINATED!

What the hell, I just got a raise a couple weeks ago (.50/hr)

Well what happened is supposedly when he turned in the stuff for my raise, the corp. hit the wrong button and I haven't REALLY been working this last week or so.

Odd.

Anyway he said he would e-mail them and all that and hopefully it will get fixed.

Sheesh.

I'm an idiot.

I am sitting here almost in tears because I have to have my wisdom teath pulled out on Friday. I hate the idea of having 4 holes in my mouth and not being able to eat anything!

As my dad just rightfully pointed out - I should NOT be afraid.

I had heart surgery at the age of 13 for Christ Sake! I beat all odds and was walking within hours of waking up! My Grammie took off work and came to take care of me but instead I made her lunch!!!


I should be fine - why am I so scared?

Mike was awesome yesterday.

He made me soup and grilled cheese for lunch.

Surprised me with rented movies.

Got me ant bait.

Made chicken and corn on the cob for dinner.

AND DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING STUPID!

Which he was rewarded with lots of affection but you know.

I told him today to be nice, he said he was yesterday and I said I know - be nice now too!!

haha

Ah I love that girl. But I guess I better since I took a week off of work and school so that I could be in her wedding.

She is no longer single and plans (of course) to be married to this boy for the rest of her life. They already have built a house together and lived together for awhile even though they have not been together as long as Mike and I.

It's wild how different that part of the world is compared to here. I would probably be pregnant or married already if I lived there still.

Even though this is a fact, I want to move back BADLY.

The wedding was wonderful - I may write more about this later but I find it amusing that I pretty much wrote her wedding vows.

Something that really urks me though is that I don't understand how she feels. It just blows my mind that she gets "a bubbly feeling everytime she sees him" and they "can't spend a day apart" etc.

I'm glad she's happy and even her dad - who is this gruff guy but SO funny - thanked me for comming more than once. He litterally waited for our car to pull up yesterday morning (day after the wedding) and called Megan telling her that he is so glad we came and thankyou.

Of course this is the same man that during the rehearsal dinner said "Bout God Damed Time" in front of a priest.

*le sigh* I love it there...I want to move back there because it's so muhc more relaxed. I MUST finish school though. I need to remind myself of this.

I'm Lost.

Hurt.

Confused.

Trapped.

So yeah I got a 75 on my adjustment test. Not happy at all about this.

Mike and I are going back and forth on getting along etc. but it's all good.

I have a ton of stuff to do that I just haven't.

I found my wallet which was missing for 2 weeks. Of course I found it right after I canceled and reordered my cards. 'eh.

I bought a shit load of jewelry making stuff so hopefully you will see some of that stuff again soon!

Hey kids. I know I've been ranting or sharing only bad news lately so here we go....


GOOD NEWS!!!

I got an 86 on my Geology exam, a 90 on my english test and a 100 on my Developmental Psych. quiz!

Now I only have to study for my Psych Adjustment test that is tomorrow, write a rough draft of a paper and then study for my Development test on Monday!!!

Wish me luck! Love ye all!

*edited to say "what's up with the 'Captain's Log' thingy?"*

So yeah - my boyfriend and I are debating going and donating plasma (obviously when I'm not sick)...


Have any of ya'll done this before?
What kind of questions do they ask?
How much did you make?

hmmmm

grrrr to those who work their job... get paid more than you but do it WRONG. Or just plain do NOT know what to do and ask you a million questions.

Really, there are things I do not know the answer to and that is fine. I ask a question once, maybe twice if the situation is slightly different and there you have it. These girls that I work with though damn. They have worked there as long as I have yet ask a million STUPID questions...

Example:
Manager J: comes and tells us to staple the applications together but then retracts his statment and says I should do it because he knows I can do it fast.
Me: I think this is cool.
Miss L: Well she decides that she will do it instead of helping customers regardless of what Manager J said.
Me: Ok whatever just get it done
Miss L: Takes 3 hours to get HALF of them done. One of the pages ran out so she stopped.
Me: Starts to work on the applications again and is greeted by...
Miss L: "I was doing that" "cut it out there aren't any more pages"
Me: "Ok? Just make more copies so that we can put them together"
Miss L: "I can't go to the back"
Me: I put the last sheet down on the copier that we use to copy peoples cards if the names do not match and make 10 copies
Miss L: "wait, that can make copies???"
Me: * SCREAMS IN HEAD!*

She snapped at me like that multiple times today. She then told me to calm down when I finally snapped back. I flat out told her - yes in front of a customer who found it all amusing - that she had snapped at me a TON today and that I was just getting sick of it.

Apparently she didn't notice before but she stayed out of my way the rest of the day.

So yes, many many stupid mistakes were made that were NOT by me. Many customers complimented me on knowing what to do in the store and I realized I REALLY should get paid more than $5.50/hr.

Love ye all - Jess

Ok everyone - we are almost done packing...this means a dreaded end tooooooo

The Internet.

At least until around mid August ... will attempt to sneak into computer labs but everyone knows that isn't going to be very often.

Love ye all - cheers!

Yeah so my sister is the cutest sweetest sister EVA!

She is three and told my dad that she wanted to see me and that I should come over.

He told her that I live far away and can't come over right now.

She then said that she wanted to call me and tell me to come over.

So she did. All because she wanted a hug.

AWWWW!!!!

I told her I was sorry and loved her bunches but can't come over because of school and work and being so far away.

She's a sweety.

I also talked to dad for awhile but having a three year old call her big sister all because she wants a hug beats all I believe.